Oh how I miss Ava's crib...

I did it, I finally took down Ava's crib. I left it up so long due to my own laziness, I like to sleep. Once you put that little girl in her crib you didn't see or hear from her until 9:00-9:30. Don't get me wrong, we have tried the toddler bed before. It didn't work so well and I didn't have the patience. She had a crib and a bed in her room for a long time and that probably confused her I suppose. She wanted to sleep in her "big bed" so we let her try. After a few chances we gave up and put her in the crib. Kyle decided she was too old for her crib and I have to agree, I just didn't want to. She will be 3 soon and I guess I have to let her grow up. Once the crib was down my heart sank just a little bit. She is growing up too fast and it makes me sad. She is fully potty trained and now the big bed. Where has my baby gone? I guess I was trying to hold on to that one last thing from when she was a baby, strange I guess. Anyways, this bed idea was as bad as I thought it was going to be. SHE WILL NOT STAY IN HER BED!!!!!!! I get mad, she laughs, oh how I miss that crib. I try to listen to super nanny but what does she know? Jokes, it kind of works but not really. The first night I sat on the floor for 1 hour 30 minutes. Shoot me in the head please. The second night she didn't have a nap that day so it didn't take too long but last night was pure hell. Almost 3 hours! I sat there for the first hour but couldn't take it any longer so I got Kyle. He sat there for the next hour and I was getting mad. I went back up and let Kyle get some sleep, it was almost midnight by this time. I guess your not supposed to say anything or make eye contact, if they get out just put them back in the bed. I don't know what I am doing at all. Nobody talks about these things so I guess your on your own. I guess I couldn't let her nap anymore but she loves to nap and if she doesn't she is a nightmare. She usually naps for 2 hours so I could bump it down to 1 and see if that works. Who knows but hopefully it will get easier soon because I don't think I can do this for much longer. Even though I am not doing anything while I am sitting there, it is exhausting. I refuse to let her sleep in my bed, she never has and she never will. I don't want her to get in that habit. I also won't sleep in her bed, I just don't want her to be dependent on Kyle and I to fall asleep. That may be harsh but that's how it is minus the fact that I can't sleep with a kicking child. She doesn't stop moving. It has to get better right? Maybe by the time she's 4...

Family Photo

I decided that just maybe it was time to take a family picture. In all honesty I have not even taken professional pictures of Jaxen yet. Yes, I am a horrible mother! We haven't had a family picture taken since Ava was one. I can say that I have been busy but in reality I am just lazy. I was going to get a friend to take them last summer but then I decided that I would like Jaxen to be able to sit. Who knew he wouldn't be able to sit until he was almost 9 months old. Anyways, I wanted to get some done before Christmas. It was a little harder than I anticipated due to the cold weather and a hyper child. Ava seriouly would not hold still and when she did she didn't want to look at the camera. This photo here was the best out of the bunch and it was the FIRST one taken. There was some other cute ones but Kyle's head was either cut off or one of us wasn't looking. All in all it was worth it. At least now I have some pictures I can give to family.

No more Presents!!!

Ava's haul last Christmas

This year Kyle and I have decided enough is enough. How many presents does a child need? Jaxen for example, he is 9 months old. Do you think he cares how many presents he gets? Does he think the more presents he gets the more we love him? No, I didn't think so. And Ava, she is only 2 years old. 2 YEARS OLD!!! We want to teach our children what Christmas is really about and not about how many presents you get. I have seen people go crazy and spend so much money. In the moment it is exciting and thrilling as you are shopping seeing what you can buy next. I am not going to lie, I have gotten sucked in before. It's fun shopping and buying lots of things for you children. When it's all over and realize how much you have really spent can make you sick to your stomach. This year we planned out exactly how much money we were going to spend on each child and not a penny more. I went out by myself last weekend to buy Kyle and the kid's gifts. Ava wanted a camera, a pink phone and a Max and Ruby video. As we were writing the letter to Santa I asked her what else she wanted(just so I had options). She put her head down and quietly said that she doesn't need anything else. Well, that made it easy for me. I headed to Toys'R'Us and got started. The camera was the most expensive but the other two items were cheap. Jaxen got some toys but I didn't want to go crazy because I already have so many toys at home. I have all the big toys from when Ava was a baby so it was mostly trucks and such. I had money left over so I went to Wal-Mart for stocking stuffers. I was in and out of Toys'R'Us but when I hit Wal-Mart it was a different story. Who knew stocking stuffers cost a lot of money, I just kept putting stuff in the cart. In the end I spent $17.00 more then I had planned. I was proud of myself and you all probably think I am crazy. Really it helps both the kids and us. They learn to not expect lots of "things" and we save money. If only I thought the same way with Kyle. I knew part of what I was going to get him when I left home and bought that right away. As I walked around the mall I kept seeing things that I wanted him to have. I really did have to restrain myself and I was happy in the end with what I bought him. I just hope he feels the same way.

Finally

Jaxen can finally sit! It took the little guy 8 1/2 months but he got it. I am having a hard time comparing him to Ava and other babies. Ava was already crawling and climbing on things at his age. He only rolls to get from place to place and now sits. I watch other babies when we are out and they seem to be able to do a lot more. He is a big boy weighing in at 23.8 pounds so maybe that has something to do with it. Heavier people have a hard time getting up so maybe it's the same. He doesn't seem to mind though, he really is a happy baby. He smiles all the time and now plays shy. It's so cute, he turns his head into his shoulder and gives a little smile. I used to hold Jaxen during the day when he was napping but that turned out against me. At night I would feed him and try to lay him down but as soon as he hit the crib he was screaming. He was used to somebody holding all the time while sleeping. It was becoming rediculous because he was dead weight in your arms so you knew he was sleeping. I decided it would be best for him to learn to comfort himself and try to cry it out. The first night was so sad, he cried for about 10 minutes and there was no signs of it stopping. The next night Jaxen cried for 10 minutes and was out cold for the rest of the night. I decided no more holding during the day and it's worked out so far. It's probably better for Ava too, having a little more one on one time. It just makes me sad that my babies are growing up so fast. Jaxen is already almost 9 months, which means almost a year which means I go back to work. That's a whole other post though....

Halloween

Too cute for words

I can never get her to smile with her eyes open

Ava was looking forward for Halloween so much. She was always asking if it was Halloween yet and if we could go trick or treating. When it came down to it they were way too sick to go trick or treating on Halloween night. They both had really bad colds and I didn't think it was fair for them to go out and get others just as sick. Instead we stayed at home in our jammies and watched Charlie Brown's Halloween special. I really just had to put them in their costumes so I could get some pictures. Ava was a cute Snow White or as she put's it "Princess". Jaxen was priceless in his skunk costume. In the end I don't think Ava cared too much, she got to eat all the left over candy.

H1N1 Vaccine

To get the vaccine or not, that is the question. I was so against the vaccine and I told everyone there is no way me or my children will be getting it. I was listening to the news and not one doctor was against it,but they are doctors, of course they are going to "recommend" it. The one side effect that stood in my mind was the chance of paralysis. The chance was one in 1 million but there is still that chance. The fact that it is a new vaccine is scary in itself. I just didn't know what to do. These sorts of pandemics are nerve racking and put you in positions you just aren't sure of. Who wants to be injected with all sorts of nasty things? But do these nasty things protect you or harm you?
There was a flu clinic in Raymond yesterday that started and 12:00pm and ran until 6:00pm. I initially wanted to get the regular flu vaccine along with my children. I got there at 11:30 and the line up was already down the sidewalk. I still wasn't sure if I was going to get the H1N1 vaccine. I started to think of the health of my children and the chances of them getting H1N1. The chances are pretty high according to the Health Region. Do I decide not to get the vaccine and take my chances of them getting H1N1 and the consequences of the sickness which could be possible death? Or do I decide to get them the vaccine and see if there any consequences to that. It is really a sticky situation to be in. In the end I decided to get the H1N1 vaccine as well as well as my children. I did figure the consequences would be worse to not get the vaccine. It made my decision a whole lot easier when I saw a respectable doctor and his family from Raymond waiting in line to receive the vaccine also. It was a nightmare experience waiting in line for 4 hours but I know that I made the right decsion for my family.
I have to tell Ava's experience. My sister Kerrie came with me to help with the children. We told Ava she would be getting a needle and it would feel like a little pinch. I would give her little pinches to prepare her and she laughed each time I did it. She was actually excited which was strange to me, I figured she just didn't get it. There was screaming kids everywhere but I don't think she was paying attention to that. Finally it was our turn after a four hour wait. She sat on my lap, pulled her sleeve and gave the nurse a smile. I looked at Kerrie in disbelief not knowing what was going to happen next. The nurse cleaned her arm with a swab and gave her the needle. Ava just sat there and gave a little chuckle and turned over to receive the next needle. She reacted the exact same way. I was so proud of my little angel. Then it was Jaxen's turn. As I was holding Jaxen I was looking at Ava and she didn't look so well. She was getting more and more white by the second. She looked sick, so I told Kerrie to take her to the bathroom incase she decided to throwup. When Jaxen was done, I went to get Ava from the bathroom but a Nurse was walking out with limp little Ava in her arms. My heart dropped as I followed them to the couch in the back of the room. After a little juice and rest Ava was ready to go again. I was the exact same way when I was little so maybe it runs in the family. It's just different when it's your little one instead of yourself. No side effects from the injection yet and lets hope it stays that way. I am not trying to promote getting the drug so please nobody think that I am. It was a hard decision for myself but I decided it was the best decision for us.

Potty Training

I have decided that this is one of the hardest things both Ava and I have done. For me is trying not to get angry everytime she says "nope, I don't have to pee" then 5 seconds later she pee's on the floor. I think Ava really doesn't care to be potty trained but she really is too old for diapers. She is going to be three is Jan. and I really want her to be diaper free by then. Everyone tells me she will get it in her own time but I don't agree. If I let her stay in her diapers it will get harder and harder to get her out. I never really knew just how stubborn she really is. Daughter like mother I suppose. I even ordered the "The Potty Bootcamp". Let me just say drill time is just horrible. Imagine going back and forth back and forth between rooms and a little girl saying "mommy what are we doing?" "stop it". It just broke my heart. We did make it through the first day but it was unsuccessful. The second and third day there was some process but everytime she goes she thinks she should get a surprise. She still wears diapers when we go out and for naptime and bedtime. I make sure that when we are at home she only wears her panties. She has gone a few times on her own but refuses to poop in the potty. She was holding it in and I knew she had to go. As soon as I put on a diaper she went. This really is one of the most frustrating things I have ever dealt with. I hope she gets it soon!

Early morning drive

I decided it was finally time to make the trip to Strathmore to visit a dear friend. Before I left I couldn't decide who I should take, Jaxen or Ava. They both have their own pros and cons but yet my heart was torn. Naturally one would think Ava might be the easiest but in reality not so much. She only eats at home or in her car seat, so fast food in usually the only option when out. My lovely little Ava has decided that she is now in charge and what she says goes. I didn't want to have to deal with a kicking and screaming child in the mall if she didn't get her way. So my poor little Ava was out.
Jaxen was the next runner up so we packed and were ready to go. We got to Strathmore eary afternoon, had some lunch and off to Balzac we went. Things we going good so far, had a little melt down in the mall but nothing a bottle couldn't fix. Three hours later we decided it was time to go. Traffic was nuts!!!! We got back home had some supper and played for awhile. Little Ellie and Jaxen we beat so it was time for bed. Jaxen it usually a good sleeper so I didn't think we would have a problem. At 8:30 both kids were out. Kristi and I went down stairs and watched a movie and had some snacks. Midnight rolled around and we headed to bed. I crawled into bed thinking I wouldn't be up til morning...wrong. My little man is such a loud sleeper, it drives me nuts. He wouldn't stop moving and banging his head at the top of the play pen. I can tell if he is restless but still sleeping but the moment I hear him sigh or coo he is up for good. I heard a little coo and we were up. I thought I could get him back to sleep but no luck for me. I knew it was over from there. I really didn't want him to wake Ellie and I really didn't want to stay awake all night.
So it was now 2:00am. What to do what to do??? I am a tad bit crazy so I decided to drive home. It was snowing so bad I thought I was going to have to turn around but thankfully it stopped. Jaxen was sleeping, I was driving, life was good. Never have I seen so much wildlife on the road, I had a couple of close calls. I got home around 5:00am feed jaxen a bottle and slept till 8:00am. Quite the little journey but if I am not sleeping at night I would rather be driving!

A little bit of Ava

This little girl makes me laugh every day. She is so funny I can't even stand it. She also knows how to push every little button I have. But you think, how could you get mad at something so cute? Ava is now 2 1/2, time goes by way too fast. She is talking away and some things she says are just too much to handle. I often wonder where she comes up with some of the stuff. I have also learned that she listens more than I give her credit for. Kyle and I will be talking about something between the two of us and days later she will bring it up. We have to be careful of what we say because you never know when she will bring it up again. Her favorite peolpe have to be her Papa Max and Papa Buck. It's funny how little kids make up names for people.

Ava sure is a daddy's girl and has him wrapped around her little finger. What she says usually goes, for the most part. Who knew it was so hard raising these little angels. Ava sure gives me a challenge everyday. Some days I want to throw in the towel but how could I? I love my children to death and I would do anything for them.

Jaxen Edward Clifton

Jaxen was born March 11, 2009 at 12:06pm weighing in at 7lbs 15oz. I was induced at 8:30am and had him 3 1/2 hours later. QUICK!!! I stayed in the shower most of the time which really seemed to help. When I was 5 cm dialated I decided to get the epidural. Literally the moment the doctor was done I was 10 cm and ready to push. No luck for me, it was like going without. Hopefully if I do it again it will work, I would like to know what it is like to have an epidural that works. It only took one, yes I said one, push to get him out. Jaxen was so much easier than Ava. Labour always seems to be a competition between women to see who had it the "worst". Or you get the women who said it wasn't that bad. Everyone is different though right???

Jaxen is now 4 months old. He is a chubby little man weighing in at 17lbs. Yes, I am aware that is a little big for someone his age but the doctors aren't worried so I am not worried either. He is a happy little guy and only cries when hungry or tired. He smiles so much, it makes my heart melt. It's not easy with two and I can only imagine how hard it is with three or four. I am not ready to find out anytime soon but time can only tell.

I don't know what I am doing...

This seems to be the happening thing these days so here it goes. I am not the best at things like this but I might use it more like a journal for me. Really, who wants to know about the Clifton's? I haven't figured out how to use the blog but we will see how it goes. This post is really just a test for me to see if I can even figure that part out. Here it goes.........